Kicked out of Walmart :)

[{OF}Malicious Assault]

Dear Mrs. Fenton, Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Bill
Fenton has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot
tolerate this type of behavior and have considered banning the entire
family from shopping in any of our stores. We have documented all
incidents on our video surveillance equipment. Three of our clerks are
attending counseling from the trouble your husband has caused. All
complaints against Mr Fenton have been compiled and are listed below.
Wal-Mart Complaint Department MEMO Re: Mr. Bill Fenton - Complaints -
15 Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse is shopping:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
restrooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's
on layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted
area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told
other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the
bedding department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to
cry and asks Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
mirror, and picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked
the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the
"Mission Impossible" theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse
through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices
again!!!!"

(And; last, but not least!)
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited a
while; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

[Soul]

some one took and changed the list of things to do while you are in walmart - still funny though.

[seamonkey]

LOL I thought it sounded familiar

[Capt. Insane]

ROFLMFAO!! That's hilarious! I gotta try some of those some time

[{OF}BadDaWg]

#15 is........................... just special!!!

[dudio]

They're all prety darn funny !